the dress... just kidding ;)

So, you still get to see the title about the dress. And if you really want to know all the latest details it does entail the dress. It came home for good this week. It's all tailored and fitted and everything. There are no more wrinkles and it's just gorgeous. But, enough about the dress.

The deal is this: I am more tired than I have ever been before in my life. I've had mono, and I've done the college/work thing. They hold nothing over planning my wedding. I'm freaking exhausted. Some of it may have to do with the fact that work has been super tough. We're talking one of the hardest starts of the school year that my school has ever seen. Let me assure you that I will probably be looking for a job at the end of the school year or so. I guess I might stay, but it really does get hard to stay after a while. I hit a year at this job in January. That's really all I need for my resume and admission applications for the future. But, then there's the kids. They are cute. But, some days they just really aren't that cute at all. So, we'll see. I just kind of want to be on the missions field somewhere honestly.

So, I think this week entails getting the cake squared away and the tuxedo rented. Also, the whole DJ thing needs to be solved. I think I'm also going to go shopping with my mom and best friend to get all of the decorations figured out. So, that's the deal. Oh, yeah, and I meet with the photographer on Wed. to get all of that figured out as well. So, seriously, that's a typical week. It's kind of fun and then you wake up and remember that you also have to pack your house because you're moving next month as well. I mean, it has all been a cool process. The invitations rock, registering was sweet, getting a new apartment was awesome and getting a couch was a freaking bonus. The deal is, is that all of that takes time and energy--some things more than others. The invitations took me about three weeks. We're talking I probably put about 20 hours of work into those bad boys, and that's not even including the slave labor I didn't hire. But, they are gone, out of here and hopefully in your hands. Anyway, enough about the rockin invitations.

I think the hardest part is that my whole identity seems to have become, Leah soon-to-be Jones, the freaking wedding planner, invitation maker, address collector, list maker and executor, and by the way bride. The bazaar part is that never again will I just be Leah Rueter. Soon I'll be Leah Jones--or Jonesie as some of you have coined already. I can remember when we were reading Don Quiote in World Thought and Culture and we were talking about whether or not changing just a name can make someone different. Prof. Hills was our guest speaker and he brought up the point that when women marry it carries significant weight because they change their name and it incorporates such a huge change. I've always waited for the day that I would get to change my name. Everyone mispronounces it and noone can spell it. But, in eight weeks and six days I will get to do just that. Change it forever. Honestly, tonight I'm kind of sad, but it's a good kind of sad. It's the sad that I've wanted to feel for a long time. Big changes and good stress is still change and stress. Huge decisions though fun and exciting are still huge. So, something as insignificant as changing my name is huge because of the change that it signifies in me.

Anyway, there's the nitty gritty. That's the deal tonight...

the dress...

Whelp, I got my dress. It's totally amazing. It was seriously the sixth dress that I tried on, too. The lady that was helping me said that usually a bride tries on "her dress" within the first five dresses. Not that I ever go with the flow anyway... number six was it and my sister picked it out. It was pretty fun too. I'm glad that I didn't have a huge, long, drawn out process that took forever and had much blood sweat and tears. It was just an afternoon with my mom, Chris's mom, my sister and my niece. Huge, huge blessing.

I think one of the coolest parts that I'm looking forward to the most is designing the invitations. Since Chris's last name is Jones, you gotta know that something Jones Soda-esk is going to pop out. My sister-in-law is going to help me with that. I'm not only excited to see the magic we can create, but I'm just excited to spend time with her and my brother. But, anyway... that's kind of the latest. Things are falling together rather nicely. I am so very blessed. I'll keep the posting going. I'm on a roll now...two in as many weeks?!

I'm not dead yet!

Ok, Ok. There shall be no more digging of graves for this site. But, it has been three full months since I've really sat down to darken the blogger's door. So, let's catch up...

I wrote the last blog because I was in the beginning of a relationship with a fabulous guy, but I had a lot of stuff from past experiences that I needed to work through. I think Chris hit it right on the head when he turned to me and asked, "Do you think I'm going to leave you? Is that what you are waiting for?" Well, since that's the pattern of the past, you may just be correct. So, I needed to grow a bit. And it was a bit hard to come to terms with some brokenness left in my life. Thus, "growing sucks."

But, moving on from that this has been an amazing ride and I have been so blessed to be a part of it. Together, Chris and I have traveled a ton, gotten to know each other better and grown a friendship. It's been amazing. We've visited friends, family and everyone in between. This weekend we're headed out to the Tri-Cities to visit Poopie and Chris's dad. Last weekend we were at Banks Lake camping with my family (where Chris asked my dad if he could marry me--in front of the whole family). A couple of weekends before that we were at Lake Tahoe going to the Jones family reunion (yep, Chris's last name is in fact Jones). It's been awesome.

Yesterday, though, really topped everything. The first date Chris ever took me on was a surprise day to Orcas Island. Yesterday was similar. I didn't know where I was going when he picked me up at 5:30am. We just started heading North. I knew we were going to Canada because I was told to bring my passport. But, other then that--Canada's a pretty big place. It was so much fun. We got into Vancouver and eventually found the travel place that we needed just in the nick of time. We went over to Vancouver Island to a little place called Nanaimo. Once in Nanaimo the Bungee Zone guys picked us up and took us out to their bungee jumping camp.

It was so beautiful. We weren't the only ones there, so we got to watch a couple of jumps before heading up our selves. We got strapped in, walked the plank and then they pushed us off. It was frickin amazing. We dropped about 140 feet in a river cannon. On doubles, they don't have you get wet, but, the next time I go, I'm getting dunked. But back to this time because what happened next was amazing. So, we're headed back down after our first bounce and Chris looks at me and says, "Hey Leah, I have a question for you. Will you marry me?" I said something to the effect of, "heck yes!" and that was pretty much everything. I couldn't believe it. Here was this amazing man taking his entire day to do something that he would never do just because it's been on my top ten list of things to do before I die. And then, he not only jumps with me, but also asks me to marry him?! Holy cow!

So, that was the most amazing date ever. The ring actually fit. It's completely gorgeous. And we finished out the night tooling around downtown Vancouver. We ate a the best Indian Cuisine called Sitar, and just finished out the night in such blessed company. Indeed, we were totally blessed the entire day.

So, that's kind of where I've been. And, that's kind of where I'll be. It's a bit hilarious at times but oh so fun. Definitely not dead... alive and thriving in fact.

Today's Thought for the Day...

Growing sucks.

U2

Tonight I'm sitting in my room listening to U2 and I'm recalling so many of the intense emotions I had at their concert this week. My roommate told me that it was a miracle that I got to go to the concert at all after describing the thoughts, the emotions, that I felt during and after the concert. There were so many parts of this concert that made it so much more than a concert. Just the fact that I knew I had to go to one before they stop touring (something I hope is not too close in the future) was crazy. I've just always known that. In fact, their concert has been on my top 10 list of things to do before I die. It was seriously that important to me. So, definitely, this has been a miracle. Something I will carry with me for my life. Things that they proclaim and stand for solidified my own things within me. I know that I am called to go and help people. That's what they do when they have time away from touring. And when they are touring, they are spreading the news that there is an entire world out there waiting for our help. So, I'm going. This I know. It's just a matter of when...

Praise the Lord for U2.

Spring Break!!

At the end of the work day on Friday life ushered in a bit of a break. I started to breath a bit deeper and take life at a slower pace. Seriously, the first few days of my break have been nothing short of luxurious. I have been well taken care of and it's kind of cool.

So, there's this guy that I met a little over a month ago. We pretty much hit it off right from the first night we met each other. It's been fun and slow and just good. Last week he had finally gained enough momentum to ask me for my phone number and then he actually called a couple of times during the week. Kind of interesting and fun... So, I was supposed to be at his house for dinner Friday night. I was also supposed to meet his roommates who have been missionaries in the past similarly to this guy. I got to the house and had a hard time figuring out how to get through the front gate when I noticed all three pairs of eyes watching me and decided that it would probably be appropriate to start making jokes before I felt like finding the nearest rock to crawl under. The roommates were totally great. We all joked around and had a great evening. I wound up staying way later than I anticipated and when I got home, I definitely drifted off to dreams with a smile on my face.

Saturday was pretty fun. I got to hang out with my sisters and my nephew and niece. It was great. Kels wanted to go to church with me, as did my mom. But, the guy, Chris, wasn't going to be there, so my mom bailed. Then I got a phone call while I was still at my sister's house. Chris' prior engagement got done ahead of schedule and he was able to come to church. When I let my mom in on that little fact she packed herself right up and came down for church to meet this boy. It was hilarious. My roommate came too, so I was surrounded by a ton of important women who all wanted to get to know this guy who is in my life all of a sudden. We went out for a late dinner after the service and the one friend that Chris did have with him totally ditched. So, Chris and I sat opposite my mom, my sister-in-law and my roommate. It seriously looked like the Spanish Inquisition. At least they were nice though because they decided to make fun of me and share "good" stories about me. It was pretty hilarious. He apparently wasn't scared away too much because we've hung out again since.

Yesterday morning at the wee hour of 6AM he picked me up and whisked me away for a surprise adventure. The only information I was let in on was the fact that we were going on a ferry ride to get to our destination. It was awesome. He picked me up and he had strawberries waiting in the car for breakfast (yeah, I was impressed too). Conversation was awesome and before long I figured out that we were going to pass my sister's espresso stand. We stopped to say hi and Chris got to meet Effie. It was totally awesome. We eventually wound up on a ferry destined for Orcas Island--part of the San Juans--and caught an early lunch once on the other side. We drove around the Island stopping to take pictures when the opportunity arose. We also drove to the top of Mt. Constitution and climbed the watch tower in the hail and freezing wind. It was hilarious. We came back on the ferry and stopped to see my sister again on our way to have dinner with my parents. Chris got to meet my dad and after that he was brave enough to join us all for bowling night. Bowling night was definitely no less crazy with Chris' presence. In fact, I'd say it just stirred the pot even more. It was hilarious. All of the church people were coming over to meet him and then my best friend from high school dropped in with her boyfriend to meet him as well. I think by the end of the evening, Chris had met about eight or nine very important people within the course of the day. He did awesome and he even stuck around until the end of bowling so that he could drop me off at my parent's house.

So, yeah. There's a lot of cool things about him that I really like. Maybe I'll sit down to write a snapshot for you next. Or, maybe I'll sit down to fill you in on the fondu party that is set at his house again for this coming Friday. Who knows. Thank the Lord that I still have five more days of break left. I'm sure that I'll have good stuff to write about for a while...

Live and in the Flesh

So, every Thursday night I go to a young adult bible study. It's awesome. We're going through the book of Acts and we're on chapter 16 this week. It has a couple of key players--Paul and Silas--who are involved in a couple of big conversions--Lydia who deals in purple cloth and the prison guard who almost committed suicide. Paul and Silas were beaten public after being stripped of clothing--publicly. They were then thrown in jail uncared for (their wounds were washed later and they were fed later). They were in pain, hungry, in doubt tired, yet it was said that at midnight they were up singing hymns and praising God. They were just stripped and beaten--publicly! And they were up singing hymns and praising God?!?

So, the question was posed, where does that kind of joy come from? What kind of relationship do you have with God to trust Him that much? How do you battle the fear of precisely this happening so that when it does happen, you're in the praising group of people instead of the grumbling, whining, complaining, sad, depressed, rejected, dejected group of people?

So, that's just something I'm chewing on for the week. It's a lot. It's big. But it is totally worth struggling with because the pay off is huge. That's all I have. Oh, except I actually have a sort of date for tomorrow night. It's Friday and I have something to do... Remind me to tell you all about it... :)

Filling the Cracks

Ok, so it has never been my greatest kept secret that I absolutely hate the month of February. It is the month that I wage war. I wage war with my single self. I wage war with my depressed self. I wage war with my lonely self. I wage war with commercial society and their ridiculous "love" holiday. Granted, it might be a different song and dance if I actually had someone to love and be loved by other than my mom who does a fabulous job every year of remembering a card and phone call. But, you know, right now I only have my notes and choreographed movements to live through. So, it's war I wage instead of love.

I think February is such a hard month because Christmas and all of it's wonderful stress doesn't happen until the end of December which causes all recoup time and further festivities to spill over heavily into January. Sure, January holds a tight budget, but it's not short in celebration as it is the first month of the new year. By February, I'm sick of winter. I'm sick of grey outside that seems to permeate the depths of the inside with undue talent. By February, I'm ready for Spring. I'm ready for new life. I'm ready for the world to come alive once again from it's long and seemingly drawn out slumber.

I think the last couple of Februaries have been so hard because of my Novembers. Huge changes in the form of men in my life happen in November. They disappear in a sense, but November is filled. November heralds in the beginning of the family season--a season of major holidays. There's no time to deal with all of the baggage that goes along with being dumped. Undoubtedly, I'm an extremely slow processor. The very fact that this paragraph is included is a testament to that fact. It just takes me longer than many. I hash and rehash and mull over experiences longer. I'm ok with that, but I'm sure my closest friends and family get tired of listening to me talk for the 100th time about something that happened months ago. And that's ok. I do a lot of self reflection on my own time and I try to line things up with the Bible. Many times I need that plumb-line because my thinking can be so skewed. Loneliness and self-doubt can do weird things to thought processes and self-portraits.

So, all that to say I honestly look forward to March more so than any other month of the year. March is my busiest month of the year by far and has been for probably seven or eight years now. March is my ray of sunshine in the clouded and grey days. Winter officially ends. I grow another year older and have a ton of fun doing it. Along with the sun comes a renewed vigor to fight the depressing crap swimming around in my brain. And once again I can see my need and a way to attain friends. This year church held some great answers. There are benefits all the way around. So, starting the young adults group was a huge step in the right direction. And being blessed and very surprised by a new friend to look forward to at church is also pretty cool as well. I would have never guessed. But, then again, that's the best kind of surprise.

And I wouldn't have it any other way... Bring on March and Spring and friends and the sun and blessings of many different sorts... I'm waiting and ready.

Wenches and Scalliwags

It's a good night. There's a lot going on in life, but it's good. I guess I'm pretty much always this way when there's a boy involved. It's kind of hilarious and it's definitely fun. And who knows if it will go past the friends phase (which I'm totally cool with), but it's just fun. Seriously, times like this make dating kind of almost fun. This huge dance that we do is sort of hilarious. I must say, as I gain more experience (and more heart ache) I get better at playing games. I don't know if that is necessarily good or not. But, it is a heck of a lot more fun. (Maybe that's just my side that has horns and a forked tail talking.)

Anyway, I've hung out with this boy for about three weeks now. We're finally to the point where we asked each other our last names tonight. Good thing there's a lot of time. If there is one thing that I learned, slower is definitely better. So, that's about it for tonight. Hope your Easter is great!

A Side of Randomness to go with that Shake

So, this weekend was totally a change of pace. I have been feeling as though I’ve kind of been stuck in a rut as of late. I have been a bit lonely and just feeling like I’m in a really odd space in life right now. I’ve been hearing a ton of sermons on the body of Christ and how important it is to get involved. I’ve appreciated that a lot because it’s given me the kick in the pants that I needed to start reaching out and trying to get involved in my new church. I have been hanging out with co-workers and trying to get to know them better, but none of them would be the type of people I would want to hang out with outside of work..

So, church is really going to be the place that I’m going to meet anyone worth hanging out with outside of my roommate and that little group of friends. The problem is, I go alone. And most weeks I have felt very anonymous. So, I decided to get involved. I started with the women’s bible study. It was cool, but it just didn’t fit. I also went to a meet and greet time after church one day and got to talk to a couple of the pastors—including the young adults pastor, Crystal. She’s totally cool and she invited me to come to the young adults singles group. I figured I’d give it a try and so I went. It was totally great. I had a great time. It wasn’t too awkward. And I didn’t feel like I was a slab of meat. It just felt good to be with similar people learning good things.

Then came Saturday. I go to church Sat. night. A couple of my best friends from Stanwood dropped in and totally surprised me at my apartment. But, they left just in time for me to slip into church half an hour late. I was just in time to catch the last song and then meet and greet those around me. I happened to sit behind a group of people mostly my age and we talked for a while. It was one of the better greeting times I’ve had to endure. In fact it went so well that during the sermon the thought popped into my head that maybe this group of people would go out to a movie or something and I would be invited to tag along. The thought passed and the sermon carried on.

At the end we all walked down the isle into the foyer together, talking. And, wouldn’t you know it, I got invited to go see a movie. That idea was eventually shot down and we settled for coffee instead. It was hilarious. By this time, the group of four had dwindled down to just two—both guys, one more my age and the other quite a bit older. So, the three of us hopped into cars and headed down to the local Starbucks. It was hilarious. They were both pretty funny, but it was just nice to connect with a couple of new people. I mentioned the singles group and the guy my age said he had been thinking about going in the past. So, maybe I’ll just start recruiting people. It won’t be so awkward if I know most of the people going…

Tomorrow's Friday!!!

Well, I know that I said I didn't want to live Friday to Friday. Unfortunately, they just make it so frickin hard when they pay you every other one. Tomorrow is not only Friday, it is also payday. Those are really the kinds of days I appreciate. A lot.

Speaking of jobs and paychecks. So, I was flipping between "Fight Club" and Court TV's coverage on Santa Maria's most infamous (ok, ok, it's Thursday afternoon, what was I supposed to do, go out and make use of the sunshine?!?) and some Tyler Durdan statements got the hampster back on the wheel. "You are not your job. You are not the car you drive. You are not how much money you have in the bank. You are not the possessions you own." How true is that? I mean, you and I both know there's just so much more to life then that. I kind of put myself out there at work today. We have a PK in my class. Obviously, he's got a bit of pressure on him since his dad is a pretty huge community figure. In fact, they are so important that they make their own kid catch the short bus at the bottom of the hill so that the neighbors don't catch a glimpse that there's anything wrong with their life. I didn't defend the motives. I gave a short little Bible lesson on the Left Behind Series that Gary Derickson would be proud of. But I didn't defend the parents. Guys, there's too much hidden shame in Christian circles. There is too much. So much of the time I feel like we can't be real not only with each other, but with our selves as well. I know that all of us want to hear the "well done, my good and faithful servant" so badly. I know that I want to hear that with everything in me. But, does hearing that mean that we cut out our humanity for the sake of "holy Christian living?" In no way shape or form! We need to wake up and realize that our sad, sick, polluted testimony is all we have to share. And that everything in that testimony speaks of love. Love enough to forgive. Love enough to redeem. Love enough to become human. Love enough. We are who God created. And He created us out of love! God loves me. If I can wrap my thoughts around that enough to grasp what that really means, I can continue on being human, making mistakes, and loving those around me who are just as human and sin riddled as I am. Share your humanity. Share your hurts. Share your pains. That's what community is all about.

Take a risk. Be human.

the disappearing act

Well, well, well... it sure has been a while. Goodness. I don't really know what to say. It's been a great last six weeks. My new job is going great. I really like all of the people--and the kids. I've been hanging out a ton with family while I have the chance. Yeah. Other than a new car and new phone, not a whole ton has changed. Yep, I finally decided to send my little red "piece of Nissan" out to pasture and found a great '02 Dodge Neon ES to fill the void. I must admit, it does fill the void nicely. It has a spoiler and moon roof and four disk CD player. It's a metallic steel blue. Basically, this car is spoiling me for sure. I get to make payments though, so there is a trade off. It doesn't have a name, though. I would definitely be open to suggestions.

Also, the fat phone finally was replaced with a much slimmer and sleeker distant cousin. Not that I'm against fat, but in some things, smaller is just better. The new number is (425) 870-3769.

So, yeah. I got stuff. It's a great new slogan. Maybe I'll copy write it and make tons of money off of it. Do you ever worry that you are selling out? Do little whispers ever come to haunt you in those quiet moments? Right now I feel as though I'm in a holding pattern. I'm waiting to be told that I can come in to do an excellent landing right into the middle of life. I don't want to live my life waiting for the next phase to happen. I don't want to live my life as if tomorrow is more important. I don't want to live my life Friday to Friday, just getting by one week at a time.

Right now I feel like I'm doing a lot of waiting. Waiting on a meaningful relationship. Waiting on figuring out what the heck I want to do with my life. Waiting to see if I'm really going to like this job. Waiting on seeing where the next door opens. Waiting on friends coming and surrounding me. Waiting on feeling normal and feeling like I fit in with the rest of the people my age. At what point do I just stop waiting and just start living? But yet, sometimes we wait on God. Like right now. I'm at a specific place in life to learn all of the stuff that I need before I can move on to the next thing. I have been at my job for six weeks. It is obvious that I haven't learned everything that I need to learn. So, I guess right now is just somewhat of a waiting and watching game. I'll agree to sit tight and live my life the way it is right now, but I'm going to keep my eyes peeled for a new opportunity to move up, move on, move out, move in, move around. It's all a matter of being content with the place that God has sovereignly chosen for me. It's a bit tricky at times. Especially when I am so lonely and still at just utter loss for words and an explanation when it comes to my broken love life. It's tough. But, even in the vast midst of it all, there He is, walking beside me and slowly guiding me through--every step of the way.

So, there's where I'm at today. I can't say that I'm always in a great space, but at least now I can go out and drive in a great space... ;)

The Weekend

Whelp, yesterday was Friday and I was very thankful for that as my first full week was completed. It's a pretty funny group of kids and staff. They are all definitely unique and definitely interesting. The staff is so strange to me. It's just such a different feel. I went from a tiny staff who had a large percentage of strong Christians (about 7 out of 13-14 regular type staff), to a huge staff (about 30 people) where there may be about four Christians, me included. It makes for some interesting conversations as they sometimes wonder about things that I would obviously tie into biblical influence. They don't see it. Most of them don't really know any better. Needless to say they are all hilarious, odd, and very R rated after the kids leave, but most of them care a lot otherwise they wouldn't be there. So, it's a good environment in which to learn about my job, but I won't be having any deep theological breakthroughs here. I could really be an educational tool for a lot of these people. It's all about being steady and consistent and having a sense of humor with everyone. I like this job. In so many different ways it will be a challenge. I also feel safer here as there are way more staff who support if a kid goes off. So, there's some thoughts on the first week. It's definitely going to be interesting and I think I'll like it.

The Jeoreb

(ok, so now that you totally didn't get that homestar reference, moving right along...)

Whelp, I survived my first day of work at the hospital. It was actually pretty fun and I think I'm really going to enjoy it. I think I'm pretty cool with the kids (six months at a crisis facility will do that to ya). I mean, kids are kids are kids. And behaviorally challenged kids are pretty similar no matter where you go. So, that's the simpler part. It's more of getting them to do things. And knowing what I'm supposed to be getting them to do...well, that is the trick. Let's just say that it was pretty entertaining to be in an environment with a whole bunch of people who were/are more eccentric than I am. Seriously, some of the people I work with make me look fairly normal. They are all pretty funny too. I think in order to work at this place for very long a sense of humor is a prerequisite. And I think that if you don't have one, you wouldn't make it very long at all.

So, lets do the run down of the day...
-my morning started off with a phone call from my carpool buddy and friend stating that she has the flu and won't be able to make it in to work. (Great! Now the only person I know won't be there to show me around.)

-I walk into the waiting room 10 minutes early and it was completely devoid of people. No one to meet me, no one to tell me where to go, no one to show me around. (I'm thinking, maybe I was wrong in picking this as my place of employment...)

-The most chipper person comes walking through and decides to show me around. (thank God I'm at least noticed!) We drop my stuff off somewhere and take off in a completely different direction meeting a lot of different people and going into a lot of different rooms. (All the while, my coffee is where my stuff is, somewhere on the other side of the building in an unmarked room...)

-We finally work our way back around the building--traveling through what seems to be multiple doors--and find my coffee in time for the morning meeting. (Ok, I think I can handle this...)

-I was introduced to everyone in the meeting--names, job titles, etc. (Am I going to be tested on this later?!?)

-As quickly as that started, it was over and I was hustled to the other side of the building into a high school room to watch and observe what goes on in the morning as kids come in. I'm basically told that one of the boys in the class has a problem with new female authority and I just need to "be firm." Well, he comes in and takes his beany off and sits down. Other kids file in and then the teacher disappears to solve a staffing problem for later on that day. The kid promptly puts the beany on over his hood. I just state the fact that hats need to be off when in the building. He responds with, "My hood is wearing the hat and besides, it's a beany turban, I have to wear it." (Great, just be firm? How about pick your battles...) After that the kid starts to say not so nice things to another kid in the room, causing that kid to leave and now I'm left with turban boy and his side-kick with another kid sitting outside in the hall way and I have no idea whether that is ok or not. (It's only 8:15!?! I have almost seven more hours of this!)

-Everyone has radios at this school. I hear them over the radios debating what they are going to do with me. All of them are basically fighting over me and they teacher, M, who has a staff member missing, my friend, wins out and I head over to his classroom. His kids are also high schoolers, but they immediately get introduced and I built report right away. They were a pretty fun group of kids--strange, but fun. I spent the better part of my day in there. And it was good.

-A couple of boys couldn't handle each other's stupid remarks and so they were both sent out into the hallway. I was sent out with them (to do what I'm not quite sure because if they really wanted to fight, it would have been easy to get me out of the way as one of them was bigger than me). And thankfully the school counselor came by and solved my problem by threatening to have both boys in a small classroom with just the three of them all day getting to know each other if they didn't get along. Both promptly solved their problems and went back into the classroom.

-I met a kid named E. He's probably about twice my size (easily) and has some of the worst social skills. Part of his treatment goals is to not use the "shock factor" when meeting new people. He failed miserably when introduced to me. He was totally nice one minute and then the next he was telling me jokes that would make even the toughest military man blush. (Note to self: Don't ever, EVER get into a situation alone with this kid with noone within yelling/screaming distance.)

-E started drawing pictures for free time later on in the day. It was cool at first. Then M, the teacher, decided that he needed to talk with the school counselor in the hallway--with the door shut--leaving me alone with all five or six kids. E's first two drawings were of men with big muscles. His third drawing, however, was of a guy with boobs. He asked me how I liked it, and when I stated that I liked his other one's better, another kid, A, decided to turn around and take a look for himself. A started yelling that it was totally disgusting and horrible and then R decided to pipe in too--A and R are the same two from the hallway earlier. R makes a "Your Dad" comment and sends A to the edge. A starts going off on E about how his dad has cancer in his leg and how it's just not cool to bring it up. (Does anyone want to sing the "Oh Shit Song?" Because I do...) I finally got A to sit back down and on task again. E thinks it's totally appropriate to keep going with the subject by saying things like, "So, A, this looks like your dad?" I finally look at E and point out the fact that A has moved on and he needs to drop it as well. He finally says ok and begins drawing again and M finds it the most opportune time to walk back into the class room again to see if I'm still alive. (Why, yes, M, I'm still alive, and I think I handled that situation fairly well for it being my first day and all... thanks for leaving me alone with them... may I remind you that it is my first day and I have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing at this moment in time!)

-They kept sending me to the other side of the building to make copies or take one of the kids to the prize closet. Easy enough--if the doors to the hallways had been marked! I kept coming back into the waiting room and finding the great receptionist who was always waiting with a laugh and smile for me. She always pointed me in the right direction. And somehow, I always made it back to the room again.

-By the end of the day, everyone was tired. It had apparently been a long day, not to mention a long week for most. They met together in the rec room for wrap up (basically a big, huge venting session for anyone who needs it) and they all apologized to me for leaving me alone with kids, without a radio or keys on my first day of work.

Monday, the kids won't be there and we're having a huge potluck lunch. I think it'll be a good start to a new week. And I think it'll be fun to get to see what happens on a more relaxed day. Anyway, it was a good first day of work. I'm sure I'll have more stories to come later. Thanks for the prayers...